haunted ;
even though i was feeling damn tired when i reached home cos of the lack of sleep, i felt so refreshed n kind of like happier tt im so sure of my choice now. but everything just crashed down on me all over again. i just felt so helpless. tt although im finally so sure tt hes the one already, the problems had to come back again. it's just so fragile now. we keep facing the extremes. i dunno how to say la. damn extreme.
oh n everyone must must must watch ratatouille. itz super nice la hahhaa. i love everything abt it. the themes, the animations, the humour, the plot n food! hahaa. totally enjoyed it.
oh n i think im dying. haha. keep feeling giddy la damn sian like can faint any time. doc said itz my stomach. n the runny nose n sorethroat n heatiness r realli bad too.
uh these few months.. so much things have happened n i dunno where to start. a couple of times i tried to blog. but ended up not knowing wad to write.. or too lazy to finish the post. it has been about 3 months already. ive been thru so much. ive made mistakes.. ive hurt others.. ive been unfair.. ive taken ppl n things for granted.. ive been hurt.. ive felt so tired.. ive broken down so many times.. ive been verbally abused by ppl n esp by someone most dear to me.. ive stood alone when even my parents dun understand.. ive been gossiped about.. ive done things tt ppl disapprove of.. ive been looked down upon.. ive lost someone's trust in me.. ive lost someone's love for me.. ive gained someone's hate for me.. IVE PULLED THROUGH ALL OF THESE. maybe the effects of some of these still remain, but i will try harder. ive been more sensitive. ive learnt to understand ppl better. ive learnt see things from more perspectives n to take ppl's criticism n disapproval. ive learnt the true importance of friendship. ive learnt to appreciate ppl n things better. ive learnt to put my pride down. ive learnt to love. ive learnt to keep my expectations down. ive learnt about destiny n fate. ive learnt to believe, esp in the things tt i do. ive learnt to follow my heart. ive learnt the true meaning of standing by someone unconditionally. ive learnt how powerful silence can be. ive learnt how powerful words can be. ive learnt how much it hurts to miss someone so badly. ive learnt how high tolerance level can be. ive learnt how love n hate is really that thin line apart. ive learnt how ideals n reality differ. ive learnt tt i never knew wads true love n i dun even think there is. ive learnt to appreciate a smile so so much. ive learnt to be strong. ive learnt to pick myself up. ive learnt about choices. ive learnt to be decisive. ive learnt how fragile relationships can be. ive learnt tt there's always a way out to everything, we just gotta find it or create it. ive learnt about taking a step back. ive learnt about giving in n succumbing. ive learnt about letting go n how difficult it is. ive learnt how emotions r so hard to control n deal with. ive learnt about jealousy. ive learnt to persevere. ive been touched deeply. ive seen through my ugly personality. ive learnt to change. ive learnt tt i can make a difference in ppl's lives too. ive learnt to still be myself. ive learnt to live. ive learnt the importance of faith. ive learnt to love. ive learnt the language of the heart. ive learnt tt even when love turns into hate, when love turns into agony, when love turns into an aimless journey, when love turns bad, it is faith tt keeps us going n i noe tt it is him whom i want to be with.
ya n theres still a lot more stuff i guess. wont elaborate on the details ba. in short, yes realli short, tt's it. n im off to slp now n off to mug tmr. omg prelims. haha. the world is still beautiful. damn beautiful in fact =) im glad tt thru the mistakes ive made, ive learnt n gained a lot more from them. oh ya. watch ratatouille =D itz the late nite randomness again. goodnite.
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